We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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