at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
