maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
