you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
