So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
whose ass print is on the piano?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
