dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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