Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
