I molested 6 butterflies tonight
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
