i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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