I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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