Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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