I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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