I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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