My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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