he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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