I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Randomize
