are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
