Buhtt sex?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
