life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
