Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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