I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize