I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
