But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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