I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize
