apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
