Why are handjobs necessary in class?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
