hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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