I'm really into asian looking animals
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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