And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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