I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
