It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
