Hey man sorry I got all grabby
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
