I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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