the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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