idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
