I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I think my moral compass just broke
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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