i just google imaged poop.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
