Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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