Me too!
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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