I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
