We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
