***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize