Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Drunk is not a location!
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
