Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
