kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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