I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
