we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
