My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
