My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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