belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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